Courtesy Doesn't Stop With Saying, "I Do" 
by T.W. Winslow

It seems the longer couples are together, the more they take each other for granted. This is especially true when it comes to extending basic courtesies. 

We say please and thank you to complete strangers every day, but all too 
often forget, or should I say neglect, to extend these same courtesies to our 
partners. Being kind, thoughtful and respectful to our partners doesn't stop 
when we say, "I do." 

You may be reading this and thinking to yourself, "That's not me." Hopefully you're right, but just to make sure, why not test yourself? Tonight, before you walk through the door, place a few dollars worth of quarters in one pocket. Then, throughout the evening, every time you neglect to say please or thank you, take a quarter out of your pocket and toss it into a jar. No cheating now! If the please or thank you isn't automatic and immediate, it doesn't count. Be honest with yourself, if you're only saying it because you don't want to toss another quarter in the jar - that doesn't count either. 

Before going to bed, take a look in the jar - can you still lift it? This of course isn't very scientific, but it just may serve as a wake up call. This might seem like a small thing, and maybe it is, but extending these basic courtesies to your partner shows them you appreciate them and all the things they do for you. It also is a reminder to you that your relationship is a partnership, and you should be thankful for all the many things your partner does for you and the contributions they make to your relationship.

Try and keep this fresh in your mind for a week or more. If packing a pocketful of quarters helps, by all means do it. And don't just stop at saying please and thank you, see if there aren't a few other things you've been neglecting - pulling out a chair, opening a car door, asking how their day was and really listening to their response, saying, "I love you," for no reason at all... the list goes on and on and on. 

As an added benefit, your partner is sure to notice your change (no, I'm not 
talking about all the quarters in the jar), and will begin to reciprocate. 

Your relationship can be all you want it to be. It just takes a little work and commitment - and maybe even a few quarters. 

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